The soft bigotry of class warfare and snobbish superiority. I bet she has a nice liberal arts degree from a progressive women’s university on her wall, right next to a picture of her catNot that I like quoting TTAG, but that comment is GOLD and accurately describes the "anti's" that I run across in real life.
Showing posts with label teh funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label teh funny. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
QOTD: Commenter GS650G
In the post at TTAG HERE:
Friday, December 9, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Quiet Enjoyment
While at the NRA Convention, we were invited to dinner and drinks at The Tilted Kilt. JayG covered this story in some detail, but I thought I might add some context to it.
We are in a sports bar. The group size is 30-40 people. The beers have flowed a little bit. We are in the presence of three actual celebrities (Breda, Unc, and JayG), as well as two Top Shot winners (Iain Harrison and Chris Reed) and some people who are just plain glad to be alive. Into this mix, "Grumpy Old Guy" and his buddy "Pouty" sit down near our group. The noise level is well over 100dB. Pictures are being taken...
So, in this atmosphere I take the below picture and Grumpy Old Guy cold stares me and jumps up.
I am on the other side of the tables from him, but Iain Harrison and Breda are right next to his table (and the subject of the picture taking), and Grumpy Old Guy basically gets up into Iain's grille and says we are disturbing his quiet enjoyment(!?!) of the place with our flashes. Said we should quit having fun, or something (I didn't hear the rest of the exchange). Then he stomps back to his table and grumbles at his friend...
I decide to take another picture. Then, I sit back down.
Grumpy Old Guy is now cold-staring me like I am a criminal and maybe hoping to intimidate me into being a good little boy... (Yeah, right!). So, I get out the HD Video camera (no flash on that one) and begin filming him. Yes, I know it was childish...but I had had enough. Apparently, he did too, and called for his check and left. If he had continued being such an overt sourpuss to us, I was ready to ask the manager to put the replay of the Royal Wedding onto the big screen above us. I am sure it wouldn't have cost me more than $100 to get it up there.
No, I am not a nice guy. ;)
Pax,
Newbius
We are in a sports bar. The group size is 30-40 people. The beers have flowed a little bit. We are in the presence of three actual celebrities (Breda, Unc, and JayG), as well as two Top Shot winners (Iain Harrison and Chris Reed) and some people who are just plain glad to be alive. Into this mix, "Grumpy Old Guy" and his buddy "Pouty" sit down near our group. The noise level is well over 100dB. Pictures are being taken...
So, in this atmosphere I take the below picture and Grumpy Old Guy cold stares me and jumps up.
I am on the other side of the tables from him, but Iain Harrison and Breda are right next to his table (and the subject of the picture taking), and Grumpy Old Guy basically gets up into Iain's grille and says we are disturbing his quiet enjoyment(!?!) of the place with our flashes. Said we should quit having fun, or something (I didn't hear the rest of the exchange). Then he stomps back to his table and grumbles at his friend...
I decide to take another picture. Then, I sit back down.
Grumpy Old Guy is now cold-staring me like I am a criminal and maybe hoping to intimidate me into being a good little boy... (Yeah, right!). So, I get out the HD Video camera (no flash on that one) and begin filming him. Yes, I know it was childish...but I had had enough. Apparently, he did too, and called for his check and left. If he had continued being such an overt sourpuss to us, I was ready to ask the manager to put the replay of the Royal Wedding onto the big screen above us. I am sure it wouldn't have cost me more than $100 to get it up there.
No, I am not a nice guy. ;)
Pax,
Newbius
Friday, April 29, 2011
The 3 AM call
Who do you want to answer the phone when it rings at 3:00 AM...or 3:30?
This time, my bride answered. It was my daughter calling to tell us that a) my phone was not working (she called my wife's cell), and b) my son was on the way to the hospital. Just like that. So, after a whopping 3 hours of sleep, I am now wide awake trying to figure out how to assist from 300 miles away.
Tried his cell phone, no answer. Tried the girlfriend's phone, no answer. When I finally reach my son's cell phone, he answers
I hear the medics in the background as they get his vitals and finish strapping him into the bus. The medic comes onto the phone and basically tells me he is fine, and going to Fairfax Hospital. Then the medic hangs up the phone.
"He's fine, and going to the Hospital"??????????!!!!! Those statements are facially incompatible. I try and call back but no answer, so I call my cell provider instead to work out the issue. (Reboot, reboot, enter some codes, reboot, hold...hold some more, reboot, fixed.)
Well, the reason the medics were called was because he had severe abdominal pain,, Debilitating abdominal pain. Nearly passed-out levels of pain. In other words, he hurt. They thought it was appendicitis. His friends called 911 when he nearly fainted. So, a trip to the hospital, some pain killers, 6+ hours and 3 iodine/radiology tests later, still nothing conclusive.
I checked in nearly hourly by phone, while suffering through a never-ending series of inane gushing American Newsreaders (on every channel) glorifying the marriage of another Elite English Welfare Recipient. You would think we were still loyal subjects of the Crown, to hear them go on about the whole thing.
So every phone call is the same: Nothing new, no results. I take a walk around the hotel.
Finally, out of frustration, I call him back. His room-mate answers the cell phone (he has great friends who stuck with him throughout). I tell the room-mate to tell my son it is probably just gas, and to 'man-up' and deal with it. We have a good laugh about the situation.
He relays the information. :)
An couple of hours later, while stuck in traffic trying to get to the NRA convention, my son finally calls me back. Says he is being discharged. They can't find any evidence of appendicitis (good), and think it is probably...constipation (lolwhut??). They prescribe some meds that *will* get things moving, and advise him to stay near a bathroom for a while just in case they do their thing. Then they kick him back onto the street. Call it the "$4,000 suppository".
Kids these days...(sigh)
Newbius
This time, my bride answered. It was my daughter calling to tell us that a) my phone was not working (she called my wife's cell), and b) my son was on the way to the hospital. Just like that. So, after a whopping 3 hours of sleep, I am now wide awake trying to figure out how to assist from 300 miles away.
Tried his cell phone, no answer. Tried the girlfriend's phone, no answer. When I finally reach my son's cell phone, he answers
"Hi-Dad-everything's-fine-yeah-the-paramedics-have-me-on-a-gurney-and-they-have-an-IV-started-but-we're-good-here. What's up?"*blink* *blink*!??!?!!!! What?" (I hate it when he does that...)
I hear the medics in the background as they get his vitals and finish strapping him into the bus. The medic comes onto the phone and basically tells me he is fine, and going to Fairfax Hospital. Then the medic hangs up the phone.
"He's fine, and going to the Hospital"??????????!!!!! Those statements are facially incompatible. I try and call back but no answer, so I call my cell provider instead to work out the issue. (Reboot, reboot, enter some codes, reboot, hold...hold some more, reboot, fixed.)
Well, the reason the medics were called was because he had severe abdominal pain,, Debilitating abdominal pain. Nearly passed-out levels of pain. In other words, he hurt. They thought it was appendicitis. His friends called 911 when he nearly fainted. So, a trip to the hospital, some pain killers, 6+ hours and 3 iodine/radiology tests later, still nothing conclusive.
I checked in nearly hourly by phone, while suffering through a never-ending series of inane gushing American Newsreaders (on every channel) glorifying the marriage of another Elite English Welfare Recipient. You would think we were still loyal subjects of the Crown, to hear them go on about the whole thing.
So every phone call is the same: Nothing new, no results. I take a walk around the hotel.
Finally, out of frustration, I call him back. His room-mate answers the cell phone (he has great friends who stuck with him throughout). I tell the room-mate to tell my son it is probably just gas, and to 'man-up' and deal with it. We have a good laugh about the situation.
He relays the information. :)
An couple of hours later, while stuck in traffic trying to get to the NRA convention, my son finally calls me back. Says he is being discharged. They can't find any evidence of appendicitis (good), and think it is probably...constipation (lolwhut??). They prescribe some meds that *will* get things moving, and advise him to stay near a bathroom for a while just in case they do their thing. Then they kick him back onto the street. Call it the "$4,000 suppository".
Kids these days...(sigh)
Newbius
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
I get it
Often, when perusing Patriot-oriented websites, I see reference to the White House occupant as "Pres__ent". Which, when thought about, is a nice representation of the man who voted "Present" for most of his political career, and who has yet to show his "ID" (birth certificate).
PresIDent ObeyMe could not be reached for comment on this issue...
Newbius
Pres
Newbius
Saturday, April 23, 2011
The Alan Gura Chair
Last night we had a gathering of Bloggers from the MD-DC-VA area. Unknown to most at time of invite was the fact that Alan Gura had also accepted my invitation to attend. Alan is an amazing person, well-versed in his field, and a stalwart advocate for our civil rights. He is a genuinely nice man, to boot.
Now, my wife was attending this gathering as well. And, while not a "gunnie" in the traditional sense, she tolerates my passion and supports our position. She was mildly amused about the way the introductions went:
(click to embiggefy)
:D
Newbius
Now, my wife was attending this gathering as well. And, while not a "gunnie" in the traditional sense, she tolerates my passion and supports our position. She was mildly amused about the way the introductions went:
Hi, over here we have CJRMultigun, SID, Andy from 'Bus Error', Alan Gura, ....(GASP!!!!!!)....., The Miller, T-Bolt...It was almost comical at times. Anyway, she was amused enough about it to memorialize the event in photo. With all the reverence I can muster then, I give you the spot where he sat...Seen below, I present to you The Alan Gura Chair:
:D
Newbius
Monday, April 18, 2011
QOTD: Security Theater
Over at Volokh, there is a thread relating to TSA Security Theater. In the comments (always a good read at Volokh), is this gem from "SG":
Newbius
My preferred screening policy for Islamic terrorists is to put out a plate of bacon. Anyone who takes a piece can go through without further hassle. Anyone who passes up the bacon gets extra screening. It’s win-win — the Islamists self-identify and everybody else gets free bacon.Can I get an "Amen!"?
I realize it will raise some false positives with vegetarians, but I figure that’s OK — I don’t trust those folks either.
Newbius
Friday, February 25, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Chicago Mayoral race update
CBS News is reporting that thousands of dead fish have been discovered along the Chicago lakefront. I guess Rahm Emanuel has finally moved back home.
Pax,
Newbius
Pax,
Newbius
Why the left projects
I have found the answer to why the left projects so much hate onto others, and yet cannot see their own.
It is because they are vampires.
Really. If you hold a mirror up to them to show their hate and violence, they don't see themselves. They only see the person holding the mirror.
Hey, Larry! How do you get rid of vampires again?
It is because they are vampires.
Really. If you hold a mirror up to them to show their hate and violence, they don't see themselves. They only see the person holding the mirror.
Hey, Larry! How do you get rid of vampires again?
Monday, May 3, 2010
As seen on #GBC
Warning: not PC!
(05:38:56 PM) Salamander: Did you hear that 7-11 is selling midget lesbians now?
(05:39:15 PM) ***ET nudges Gay_Cynic, "Eh? Eh? Eh?"
(05:39:35 PM) ET: Salamander, do they sell them in six packs?
(05:39:43 PM) Salamander: I saw a sign "Half Gal Homo" on the shelf.
(05:40:25 PM) Newbius: wouldn't that be a tranny?
(05:40:32 PM) ET: lol
(05:38:56 PM) Salamander: Did you hear that 7-11 is selling midget lesbians now?
(05:39:15 PM) ***ET nudges Gay_Cynic, "Eh? Eh? Eh?"
(05:39:35 PM) ET: Salamander, do they sell them in six packs?
(05:39:43 PM) Salamander: I saw a sign "Half Gal Homo" on the shelf.
(05:40:25 PM) Newbius: wouldn't that be a tranny?
(05:40:32 PM) ET: lol
Friday, February 19, 2010
Too funny
Stolen shamelessly in its entirety from Shooting Illustrated's Forums:
Go RTWT and also click the embedded link to the source story.
Pax,
Newbius
Memo to BATFE: you might want to raid the Department of Homeland Security. After all, it has lost a rather large number of firearms. If an FFL dealer lost this many guns, the license holder would be in jail (with his house burned to the ground and his dogs shot). Just a thought...
Go RTWT and also click the embedded link to the source story.
Pax,
Newbius
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Tiger Woods endorsement?
An unsubstantiated rumor has it that GM is dropping their sponsorship of Tiger, and that Ford is adding him as a spokesman.
Tiger will no longer be endorsing the Rendezvous. Instead, he will be championing the Escape.
:)
Pax,
Newbius
Tiger will no longer be endorsing the Rendezvous. Instead, he will be championing the Escape.
:)
Pax,
Newbius
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
A Salesman
A young guy from Wyoming moves to
California and goes to a big department
store looking for a job. The manager
says, "Do you have any sales experience?"
The kid says, "Yeah, I was a salesman
back home in Wyoming."
Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave
him the job. "You start tomorrow.
I'll come down after we close and see
how you did."
His first day on the job was rough but
he got through it. After the store
was locked up, the boss came down.
"How many sales did you make today?"
The kid says, "One."
The boss says, "Just one? Our sales
people average 20 or 30 sales a day.
How much was the sale for?"
Kid says, "$101,237.64."
Boss says, "$101,237.64? What the hell
did you sell?"
Kid says, "First I sold him a small fish
hook. Then I sold him a medium fish hook.
Then I sold him a larger fish hook. Then
I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked
him where he was going fishing and he said
down at the coast, so I told him he was
going to need a boat, so we went down to
the boat department and I sold him that
twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said
he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull
it, so I took him down to the automotive
department and sold him that 4X4 Blazer."
The boss said, "A guy came in here to
buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat
and a truck?"
Kid says, "No, he came in here to buy
a box of tampons for his wife and I
said, "Well, your weekend's shot,
you might as well go fishing!"
California and goes to a big department
store looking for a job. The manager
says, "Do you have any sales experience?"
The kid says, "Yeah, I was a salesman
back home in Wyoming."
Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave
him the job. "You start tomorrow.
I'll come down after we close and see
how you did."
His first day on the job was rough but
he got through it. After the store
was locked up, the boss came down.
"How many sales did you make today?"
The kid says, "One."
The boss says, "Just one? Our sales
people average 20 or 30 sales a day.
How much was the sale for?"
Kid says, "$101,237.64."
Boss says, "$101,237.64? What the hell
did you sell?"
Kid says, "First I sold him a small fish
hook. Then I sold him a medium fish hook.
Then I sold him a larger fish hook. Then
I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked
him where he was going fishing and he said
down at the coast, so I told him he was
going to need a boat, so we went down to
the boat department and I sold him that
twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said
he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull
it, so I took him down to the automotive
department and sold him that 4X4 Blazer."
The boss said, "A guy came in here to
buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat
and a truck?"
Kid says, "No, he came in here to buy
a box of tampons for his wife and I
said, "Well, your weekend's shot,
you might as well go fishing!"
Sunday, January 10, 2010
We don't need no steenkin pants
Where is Robb Allen when you need him?
Via Yahoo News: Hundreds strip in NYC for no-pants subway ride.
Some days, you just have to go commando...
Pax,
Newbius
Via Yahoo News: Hundreds strip in NYC for no-pants subway ride.
Some days, you just have to go commando...
Pax,
Newbius
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Oops
So, I am at the range yesterday with some friends. I have my eyes and ears on and have just stepped up to the line with my EvilBlackRifle to loose a few rounds. As I lean into the shot, my phone contacts the table in such a way as to: "Press OK to Unlock", "Press Contacts", Select my sister in California, hit "Send"...
Her husband answers the phone to the sound of gunfire erupting...
Lots of gunfire...
Followed by an eerie silence as the entire line reloaded (completely coincidentally), and then my phone shuts off.
On my way to the restaurant after the range session, I fish my phone out of my pocket to call one of our group and notice that I have a recent call to my sister (?!??), and I redial her.
Her husband answers and asks me if I am OK...
Oops... :)
I really should call them more often!
Pax,
Newbius
Her husband answers the phone to the sound of gunfire erupting...
Lots of gunfire...
Followed by an eerie silence as the entire line reloaded (completely coincidentally), and then my phone shuts off.
On my way to the restaurant after the range session, I fish my phone out of my pocket to call one of our group and notice that I have a recent call to my sister (?!??), and I redial her.
Her husband answers and asks me if I am OK...
Oops... :)
I really should call them more often!
Pax,
Newbius
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)